The Big One (if you havn't read The Vendetta, read that first)

So you know the whole war between Janet and I? I made her some dinner and I didn't get anything back for a week so I figured she either left on vacation, or she had given up! I hoped it was the second one. On Sunday night I heard the phone ring, and it was the enemy, requesting to speak to my mother. She wasn't home though, but she didn't really need to speak with her at all! She wanted to know if I was home! So she could go through with the evil plan. She then called Kaitlyn and told her to go to my house. Kaitlyn rushed over in a panic and came running up the stairs demanding to know if Lizzy and i were any part of what Janet needed to her to come to my house for. I assured her I was as clueless as she was. But Lizzy, she knew something. However she was sworn to secrecy. We were out of luck! A little while later we hear Janet and Chad's car pull up to the house. We run to the window and see them coming up the walkway with the dishes from the meal I had made. We welcomed them into the house and started a nice conversation. She had admitted defeat! Finally, victory was mine! Or so I thought. She and Chad were saying how good it was and that they couldn't possibly think of something to top that. In my head I was thinking, "Oh that's so easy to top! Come on! Maybe they are just getting tired of this and bored with it" So I accepted their defeat and was happy. Then Janet pulls out her camera and shows us a video of her little dog Abby playing with some rats. Nice cover! The camera was later used in her evil plan! The doorbell rings, and she says, "Sarah, Kaitlyn, you better go get that". We stop dead in our tracks and think oh, no, what has she done? We go to the door and open it up to find two boys, sorry, men, standing there with signs in their hands that say I'm here for Sarah, and the other, I'm here for Kaitlyn. And they had masks on with the actor's face on it. Except for The one who came for Kaitlyn, his had a question mark on it because she hasn't finished the book so she didn't want to see what he looked like. Our mouths drop to the floor. We were completely convinced she had given up! We invite them inside and they pull cookies out from behind their backs and give them to us. Then they ask us to lead them to the piano. Apparently they have a performance, this scared us. So eventually after knocking into tables and couches they get there and one of them starts playing the piano while the other does interpretive dancing. It was quite the show. We were laughing our heads off! When they were done they sang us a song and left to their car. This all happened and none of us even saw each other's faces! We didn't know them, and they didn't know us. Now I don't quite know how we are going to top this one, but one thing is for certain, it is not over! So tune in later for "The Crushing of Janet!" Muahahaha!

ANNOUNCEMENT!

So Elizabeth and I often get into little quarrels that may or may not turn violent. When it does it is usually because she thinks she is tougher than I and she tries to prove it. She ALWAYS fails. To the human eye most people think, oh yeah, Lizzy is the stronger one, shes bigger than that little Sarah and can take her. I am her to tell you that this is BULL HONKEY! I can pin her to the ground within seconds of her little chicken noises she makes to try to draw me in. She is always in denial of her weakness, but it is there, ooohh let me tell you it is there. This just needed to be said. So don't mess with Super Woman, aka me, aka Sarah :)

The vendetta!

As many of you know, Stephenie Meyer's Twilight book series are an obsession in our household. Unless of course there is a stronger word. I, Sarah,(like you even need to know who i am, i'm the only one who writes these things) am insanely excited for the movie to come out. Though I do think, no, I know that it will be a piece of crap compared to the amazing books. I'm sorry, but Robert Pattenson, you are no Edward. I am trying my hardest to accept you, but it is a task too hard to handle. Hopefully before December 12, the holy date, my heart will have softened. But for now I have not replaced the true Edward I have created in my mind with you.

Now for a little story that goes along with talking about these characters. So I went on a bike ride the other day, and decided that i would go to visit a dear dear family friend. Janet Murdock. We were sitting and talking and eventually the subject came to twilight. We began discussing the new book that will be coming out in I believe 15 days(I can hear the heavens singing!) and how amazing it will be. Then the conversation turned to one almost of violence. It was when we started talking about him, Robert Pattinson. The Edward to be in the upcoming movie. I am definitely not a fan. There are numerous reasons for why he should not be the actor for this character. But all is said and done so I have accepted there is nothing I can do to fix this disaster. Anyways, I was literally flailing my arms around complaining about this terrible thing that has happened and Janet was sitting there trying to calm me down and explain to me that I need to accept him. I, being the stubborn girl that I am did not take her advice.

Later that night I come home from young women's and as I am waling up the steps to the door and I see a single piece of paper with a picture of Robert Pattenson which says, come on Sarah, wont you give me a chance to be your Edward? I promise, I wont let you down. Love Robert Pattinson. The first thing that pops into my mind is what? Is this some sort of weird joke? Wait, JANET! I immediately started thinking of how to pay her back. I had a plan, but instead of doing it right away, I decided to go give her a little visit, you know, to make her think all was good. Little did she know that I had a score to settle, a vendetta! So we sat and chatted and I played with her grandchildren and talked about melted M&Ms and she made a few dirty jokes(bet you didn't want me to post that huh Janet? muahaha!) And then I left due to the fact it was now getting dark out.

The next day, yesterday, I decided to go though with my plan. I, and my partners in crime, Kaitlyn and Lizzy, rode over to her house on our bikes. I had a pack with my materials for the payback. On the windshield of her car I put a picture of Robert Pattinson which was poorly printed due to the fact we had no ink, a note that said something about him being so ugly he ruined my printer, and big tomatoes all around him(though now that I think about it, garlic may have been a better plan). I was so scared that she would see me, she was sitting by her computer right through the window that was almost directly in front of the car. I rushed to finish, I taping the pieces on while Kaitlyn rolled little pieces of tape for me. As soon as we were done, we ran to our bikes and rode away yelling, "JANET!!!" Hoping she would go outside and see it before it grew dark outside. When we got to the end of the street I froze and said. "Oh no! I forgot my sunglasses! They're on the hood of her car!" I sat there on my bike seat in terror of what I knew I was going to have to do. Kaitlyn says, "They'll be ok, she will know they're yours and just take them inside" But I could no longer trust Janet! She could have held then hostage! So I quickly rode back and set my bike beside a bush in her front yard. I then stealthily snuck to the front of her car, went to the edge of the front of the car and stuck my hand up, grabbed my sunglasses and ran back to my bike. Whew! I had done it. We rode back home and thought all was well. Little did I know that she would continue this battle.

This morning as we were sitting and watching television, the doorbell rang because a package had arrived so we went to retrieve it. When we were closing the door there was a paper attached to it. Another note from Janet. This one read, "Dearest Sarah, rumor has it that you think my hotness melted your ink while printing my picture. Actually I'm surprised, usually my icy coolness prints quite well...lets test my theory...(then a couple pictures were printed) Yup, I still have it, cool to the touch, yet still smoking hot! I know what you're thinking(No really, I KNOW what your thinking, it's my gift. You're just not listening to your heart. Try harder Sarah, I know you can do this! Robert.

This is just a little note to you Janet, this war, is NOT over!

Story to be continued(until she gives up)...

Just an FYI...

I want to appologize for the picture you see up at the top of this page. Though I, Sarah, being the daughter of two beyond crazy parents, I did not purposely put a picture of the family without them in it. We havn't actually taken a family picture together in a VERY long time. Sorry mom and dad, i still love you... :)

Oh Elizabeth...

So we were having family home evening as any good mormon family should every monday night... ha. Anyways we were reading an article about Cancer, nutrition, and the word of wisdom and Lizzy was assigned to read the section about standards for temporal health and it reads as follows, "While the Word of Wisdom does not rely on scientific proof..." So she is reading this sentence and immediately when she gets to "does not rely" she says, "Ha, they spelled the word 'really' wrong!" This began a giggle fest among all present and definitely created yet another reason to back anyone up when they say that Lizzy is a dork.